How quickly can you list 50 things that bring you joy or make you feel grateful?
I begin every coaching session by asking my clients to recall a tiny win from the week, or something that made them feel happy or grateful.
Sometimes they have something ready to share. But often, even though they know I'll ask this question, unless something big happened that week, it catches them off guard and they need a moment to think.
And when we dig a little deeper about their “tiny win,” it often turns out that it represents something much bigger that deserves celebration.
Here's my point if you're only looking for happiness in the big things, you're missing out on a lot of joy (and you may be waiting for a long time).
Don’t forget to take joy wherever you find it. Every little thing that makes you happy gives your brain an extra hit of dopamine and other feel-good chemicals. Enjoying the small moments is great for your brain chemistry.
Think of it like this if you had a rule that you wouldn't pick up money that you found on the street unless it was at least a dollar bill, you’d leave all of the coins behind. On the other hand, if you picked up every penny on the street, chances are you’d have a dollar's worth of pennies fairly soon. Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not suggesting that you pick up filthy coins on the street. What I am suggesting is that you learn to notice all of the tiny wonderful things around you.
A few examples:
The sparkles on the sidewalk as you walk down the street.
The way your dog smiles at you.
The way your cat's tail twitches as she looks out the window.
How comfortable your bed is (and if it isn’t, maybe you should consider changing that).
Here are a few things that bring me joy every single day:
The beauty of every single piece of fur on my cats (and that my phone can take such amazing photos of it).
The beautiful markings on my cat’s legs.
These two mugs. My stepdaughter bought them because her friend designed them. I bought a pair too because they are beautiful and because every time I use one of them, I get to think about how much I love my stepdaughter.
Watching my cat Stripe wash her cute little face!
Moving the teabags I use every day from stacked boxes on a shelf in the cabinet above the electric kettle into a drawer right in front of the kettle. It probably saves me only a 45 seconds twice a day, but it makes me happy every time I open that drawer and think about how much easier it is.
Is it silly to find joy in where my teabags are stored? Maybe.
But what happens when you find joy in hundreds of places every day? What does that do for your energy?
And when you can find joy in the little things, imagine what it feels like when something big happens?
And what happens when your brain predisposed to finding joy and it runs into something slightly less than joyful? A shredded kleenex, for example? [photo] Instead of being annoyed at a wasted Kleenex, you just have a laugh at how silly your cat is. It’s really that simple.
When your happiness bank account has a bigger balance, it’s better able to take a hit when something big happens. If you’ve got $100,000 in the bank, replacing a hot water heater isn’t as devastating as if you have only $1,000. So I invite you to look around you, even just in the room you are sitting in right now, and find some things to be happy about, or grateful for.
It’ll do you good. I promise.
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